Find The Fault No 37
I miss the insides of proper buses. It was the quality of the fittings- hardwood slatted floors, built in grab handles and little chrome ash trays like those in cinemas for your Woodbine ash. Amongst the best ever of course were the Routemasters, particularly the unrefurbished ones. A true bus for London, designed specifically for the capital's operators, crews and passengers. A far cry from the simply appalling off-the-shelf designs we have now have to endure, particularly the wretched bendy bus. But hope may be at hand if one of the winning designs for a new bus for London actually gets made.
That bleeder on the left is smoking a pipe on the lower deck. He can't do that! Oy! You without the hat! Upstairs with you!
ReplyDeleteYes Ron, now look at it properly and give the right answer.
ReplyDeleteOh Lord. OK, where's the bell cord? Ding ding!
ReplyDeleteGot it! The shadows, there must be two suns over the High Street! Please say I'm right, pleeeease?
ReplyDeleteRon, lie down in a dark room until it's time for your breakfast of stewed figs and All Bran.
ReplyDeleteis it that the bus is left hand drive,or maybe not,if a private operator with an eye to profit,has taken to running a grey import
ReplyDeleteThank goodeness for some sanity. Yes Bucks,the card says "The drivers cabin is at the wrong side of the bus". Unless of course we're in Gdansk or somewhere.
ReplyDeleteOh great. I had my chance and blew it. That comes of living where they drive on the wrong side of the road. But I'm still right about that bloke with the pipe and I don't care what you say.
ReplyDeleteSorry Ron, of course you're right, I shouldn't have been so dismissive. Buses also had a little notice above the windows that said 'No Spitting'. I never really new if they meant spreading typhoid germs inside the bus or gobbing out onto passing traffic.
ReplyDeleteOh dear, oh dear - looks like I've arrived just in time to save the day .... Ron,you're absolutely right about the smoker. interesting how you've all failed to recognise Washburn Street, Beulah, North Dakota - the intersection ahead there is Washburn & Bentley. Back in '54 the Beulah Transit Corporation ran a series of UK bus trials, predominently based around the Gardner 5 cylinder 5.2 litre diesel renowned for its reliability and fuel economy. Several makes where featured in the trails with help from a UK Government programme, double deckers where a failure because of the overhead traffic signals. I love the artists attention to detail - the Ford V8 Pilot of Beulah's Sherrif's Department pulled up (illegally) outside Roy's Deli, Deputy inside chatting up the waitress over his breakfast special ......... Well that explains the left hand drive bus for you - well done to Ron.
ReplyDeleteActually, having the driver on the left is quite correct as it illustrates an early form of one man operated bus. You could pay the chap through the cab window and then mount up at his rear, so to speak.
ReplyDeleteThe real fault here is the incandescent pearl lightbulbs used for internal illumination. R€move them, now please, if you would. We're in €urope now, where the lights have a tradition of going out.
Thankyou Diplo, we were relying on you. And thankyou Office Pest for reminding me about the extinction today of the traditional light bulb. Blog coming on I fear.
ReplyDeleteStone me ! Suppose I should have known better than to stack up against such erudite company.
ReplyDeleteBut what the hell...at least I enjoyed an 8 minute wallow of self satisfied smugness !Apparently everyone is entitled to 15 minutes of fame so on that basis I`ve got 7 minutes to go.
Like the man said..."I`ll Be Back!".
Clearly what's missing here is some Paul Nash or Enid Marx designed moquette fabric on the seats. Or did they not put these on the export-model LHD buses?
ReplyDeleteBucks: Your comments are most welcome and erudite. Keep 'em coming please.
ReplyDeleteWilko: Don't get me goin' on LT seat moquettes. I missed a limited edition book many years ago on just that subject that had a cover in, wait for it, actual original LT moquette.
I've applied to the intraweb cops to have this site shut down before somebody gets hurt ... (I have an LT moquette seat)
ReplyDeleteDon't want to get anybody into trouble - BUT - go see: http://shop.tfl.gov.uk/Kitchen-and-home/London-Transport-moquette-bags.html
ReplyDeletetoodle pip
Tried that link Diplo, and it said "This page has been removed". You've obviously been busy already.
ReplyDeleteGrown men talking about moquette bags. What have I started? The link worked when I tried it, though...
ReplyDeleteI was told as a child that the "No Spitting" instruction was to do with preventing the spread of TB. On many buses, the second letter had inevitably been altered by hand, just as on trains the instruction "Do Not Lean Out Of The Window" was almost always changed to "Do Not Clean Soot Off The Window".
ReplyDeleteAh, Wellwynder, thankyou. Train carriages had many little notices, and the one I liked best was the tiny sign saying what wood had been used in the compartment panelling. ("Wood? What's that?". East Midlands Trains.)
ReplyDeleteI always rather liked the one about "Penalty For Improper Use" Just what constituted "Improper" exercised my over- active pre -pubescent nasty little mind during many a tedious journey to school in the 50`s.
ReplyDeleteAnd then I found I could travel almost anonymously by occupying the luggage rack.Knots in the string weren`t too comfy though.....So we discovered that we could pull out the long seat cushion (Yep.it was moquette)and shove Fatty Hodson underneath it down by all the heater stuff. Always good for a laugh especially when he would go bright purple and burst into tears !
That`ll be it,then.
I thought 'No Spitting' was encouraging hygiene in teenages having sex in the back of the bus
ReplyDeleteOh dear - oh dear, I'm sure some the umitigated readers will find that sort of input hard to swallow.......
ReplyDelete