Thursday, 31 July 2008

The Glooston Terror


It is late afternoon, the brassy sun starting to dip down towards the field edge. But against the lane something stirs under the bark of an ash tree already being strangled by ivy. Billowing out from the trunk it rapidly multiplies itself, silent dark orange bubbles manifesting themselves in the dying light.

The only trouble is, I haven't a clue as to what it's called. The girls have worked overtime in the library again, and we did think we'd hit the jackpot with Fistulina hepatica or Ganderma resinaceum, but were ultimately disappointed. But maybe the alien-like appearance is because it's still an infant. After all, don't these things usually pop-out in the autumn? So it's over to you dear readers. I expect that there will be a fair amount of cod latin suggestions of a doubtful nature, but I do hope that there will be some more scholarly work put in. Of course it may be that this is an entirely new species, brought here from another galaxy. There were rumours of bright lights emanating from near the Glooston pub the other night, but that may have been one of the clientele going home with his car headlights on for once.

10 comments:

A F-A said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Fred Fibonacci said...

Whatever it is I think it's curtains for the tree. Unless, of course, it's droppings from a giant bat, like the one staring at me through my window.

expat said...

It is a bracket fungus possibly Chicken of the Woods (Sulphur Polyphore)
http://www.ephotozine.com/u29003/gallery/203970
Yours looks a bit old and not so good to eat. I don't think it means that the tree is doomed.

Philip Wilkinson said...

Cor! 'Our foot's in the door,' as Sylvia Plath said. Like expat, I was wondering if this was Chicken in the Woods, but my resident mushroom-expert has just decamped to Central Europe (land of the mushroom) for a few weeks, so I don't have the benefit of her advice.

Fred Fibonacci said...

Let's hope the tree does survive. I understood that a visible growth indicated extensive and invasive internal fungal infestation; hence previous gloomy Glooston comment. We must ask Lord Ashley to make regular health visits to see how the tree's getting on. If he's got time between the seemingly endless celebrations of course.

Peter Ashley said...

Oh I don't know about that Fred, The Queen's just been on the phone. Talking of Her Majesty, when I was about twelve years old I dreamt that I 'made love'to her in Buckingham Palace, and in the morning Prince Philip made us both bacon and eggs as we sat at a little formica-topped table. He was wearing guardsman's trousers, but with the box felt braces hanging down. Never forgotten that.

Philip Wilkinson said...

Formica-topped table? Wonder if she has one tucked away somewhere. Some of her garden chairs are plastic, you know. But it is British racing green plastic...

Peter Ashley said...

Of course, I'd forgotten that Phil was now our Royal Correspondent.

Philip Wilkinson said...

I thought I might fill the gap that was left when the marvellous Jennie Bond turned on her heels and left the Mall for the last time. But I see that, in the face of those who have a direct line to Her Majesty, I'm outclassed.

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